Laze's Syndrome

This is it. The last night at home.

I'm going back to ky tomorrow, around the evening so I'd have time to unpack and do some studying. Now, as I sit in my room during the last few hours left of this saturday, a table cluttered with books stare back at me. Have I done enough? I wonder. Did I fully use the privileges I had when I was in penang? Did I put in the maximum amount of study hours every day? The only way to tell is how well I do, I guess. I'm sorry for being sombre right now, but exams do that to you. Sucks the life and fun right outta ya.

We all will eventually face the inevitable fact that as we grow older, we become more and more busy and have less time for leisure, our friends, and basically anything unproductive. Whether we like it or not, we will have to come to terms with it one day. Some rise early and prepared to the change, some are late bloomers--which I think I am. I started out as a not-so-serious, laid back kinda guy. Those were the days when I used to care about absolutely nothing. I'm not saying I miss it, because I know it wasn't a good way to live..I'm just saying I was so accustomed to not worrying about anything, that when the time comes to be extremely serious about something, I can't immediately set my mind to it... and I have a feeling that I'm probably not the only one.

Everyone says how balance is key to a good life--between studies and leisure, relationships and work--basically the serious and the chill. I wouldn't say that I can perfectly balance between the two. Sometimes its 60-40, sometimes it's 30-70. Maybe that's all I want in life. Balance.
  I don't want materialistic property like a gigantic house, smart phones and two rows of cars. I just want to stand at the top of the pyramid. I want to be able to face serious matters with ease, without procrastination. I want to be able to have a smashing time with my friends while also maintaining the priorities of real life problems. I want to act.

Wanting to act and actually acting are two very different things, though. May Allah guide me to what is right.